Classical Jokes26- Page

I was down the police station the other day, hands cuffed behind my back while I was being questioned. Surprisingly, one of the officers was kind enough to bring me some tea and a biscuit. I didn't know how to take it.

My mate plays the violin and he's makes me hold up the music sheets while he plays. I'm sick of doing it, so now I'm making a stand.

I found a rock made of quartz the other day, It was gneiss

Why don't you want to go to Syria? Because it's between Iraq and a hard place.

Has one heard of the signifance of the letters c, t, s and q? It appears they are inconsequential

According to reports, Gordon Brown is moving to cut nuclear subs. Wish he'd just leave my lunchtime sandwiches alone and get on with the business of government.

My doctors surgery does a drop in session every friday, 12:00- 2:00 But when I arrived, the doctor looked at me in a funny way. Probably something to do with the parachute on my back.

Roy walkers opinion on 7UP , " Its good , but its not sprite "

Microsoft has released its new operating system, the Windows 7. I still think that sounds more like a double glazing terrorist group.

I'm going to the opening of the new local hive today. They're giving away free bees.